Saturday, July 6, 2013

End of the Road

              So this is it eh, I don't have to come back here anymore, as per what they requested I still had to come till the end of the month which was supposed to be a Tuesday, but since I had to take a leave on Thursday which couldn't be avoided no matter what, they relieved me 4 days sooner. And well told not to tell anyone about it either, to save themselves the trouble adjusting with all the after effects. Now that I look back at it, I never really told anyone I'm going and will never be coming back there again, at least never again as an employee. I just had to go out the door silently without any proper goodbyes or anything, of course leaving from here, none would cry out for me as it is the case with everyone, they'll all be rather be happy that I'm out of this pit finally. I did tell just a few, that this is it, I'm free from this once and for all, seeking pastures new. 

                      Come to think of it, it wasn't actually the hell anyone working there would say, though they still have lots of issues from the management side of things, as none really ever took any effort to see to it that the employees are happy working there, all they cared about was getting the work done, even if you skip food and sleep. Of course, I never had to go through that much of hell, I was always the one lazing around yet somehow managed to get things done, thanks to having my own laptop, so I did all the stupid work usually at home, behind the scenes, so none actually appreciates that cause they don't see it right. For me the only time I study, if you're wondering what study here - I though screwed up my life cause of my blunder of thinking that a job was the most important thing and neglected studies especially in the last semester, where I had to work at night and sit in class during the day, which actually meant the maximum sleep I ever had at a stretch was under 3 hours a day, you can guess the strain that will be having on you when it goes on for months; so well never mind that the context was to the fact about the earnings to the working ratio. I have a strange habit or I don't know yet if its just in my mind or what, I can only study in the early morning, otherwise I tend to forget the stuff during exams, no matter how thoroughly I study, but none really accepts that, but for me it's so. And working for that matter, I even went to that extent or working up late night the day before exam cause it was so important to get it done, so literally that exam was screwed cause I never woke up in the morning, for the record I try to sleep at around 8pm to wake up at 3 to study 3 hours straight with no disturbances or distractions, but sleeping after 11pm well that blew it all. The result was obvious. 

               Then they used to have those special exams, well most of which I skipped cause of the 10x raise in exam fees per paper all of a sudden. And if at all I went to write, would try to hurry back to office so never really bothered sitting there in the hall much longer, gave more importance to being in the office. Guess it was my bad not realizing what was really more important. And on top of all that I had to work with my own laptop in office, well ain't that amazing? Most offices will never allow such a thing, but I just had to choose it cause I was denied my rightful chance to get day shift, and I badly needed it at that since exams were approaching and I couldn't afford to work in night shifts during that time, ever since then for the rest of my working career there, I have been working on my own laptop, wouldn't it have been better if I worked from home then? Considering the salary, more than half of it was spent on travel alone, which even prompted dad to say, even the carpenter earns 30k per month and the staff working in our own shop earn more than what you do. That's the state of an IT engineer in the present day world. All you could proclaim out was "I am Software Engineer working in Technopark", the ones who have never been inside doesn't have a clue that its worse than the other jobs out there which people may consider to be cheap. 

                      Thanks to the extensive working environment here, people who have left for pastures new never found the work there extensive and they all have flourished. Earning over double the salary with just half the workload. Though I broke up with it then and there, for there was no future for iPhone development beyond 10 years at max, not that I was looking so far ahead into the future, I was made to look beyond and so I chose to part ways with my job once and for all. 

                        It was dad's cousin who emphasized on it. And one thing that I've to state for and against what's happening around. It's really hard to find a job out there, there's just too many people trying for that single spot and getting a job is really hard. And the other side of the coin, you're taken in only if you've the skills and its always mutual, if the employees aren't there, then there is no company. We earn our salary from them, but its our hard work which lets them get all the profit. No company is ever going to take you to be a loyal dog, you've to be useful for them and its always been mutual. No one would leave a perfect working environment, everyone works to earn money for a living. You can't be miserly about that and then complain that you traitor you left, you could've asked for a hike if you wanted, like that ever did any help until they've got a new job. Besides which company ever does tell you to ask for a hike? Isn't it the managements duty to hike the salary after the proposed time period? Never mind all that, I think it's working better right now, can't say anything. As far the working environment is considered, none would've left if they were paid appropriately for their work, that I can guarantee. 

                          Truth be told, I never expected to leave so soon in the first place, and even more I never would've even thought about leaving if no one ever left, but money is all we need and that's why we are working hearing all the firing and shit in the process. If the employee feels he ain't getting paid for it, that's it. I'll miss that place, and all the people there, made a lot of friends there and it sure was hell lot of fun, especially during night shifts. And the only ill feeling I've is that, I was kind of rated the worst out of our group, everyone knew who worked hard, but putting me last, after all this sure hurt, and that coupled with something else kinda made me burst in office for the first time ever. I rarely ever get angry, and I hate getting angry which eventually makes me feel guilty and I cry for loosing control of myself. 

          So that is it, I left even before my bond period which was due to be completed after one more month. Without saying goodbye to anyone, the friends in office nor the friends I made in the bus. It was a cursed fate that day, when I left as for some reason the direct bus home showed up so late and the cloudy sky made me get in that bus and go home. Thanks to all of them for the support from the start till the end. 

           I don't feel guilty that much anymore cause I'm not jumping ship lured by money, I'm abandoning the entire trip and taking a U-turn drifting away from the originally set destination.  I never had a choice in case of quitting the job for I chose to work during college days and screwed up my career working, in the sense of the degree. A lot of lessons learnt, a unforgettable experience.

      I may have to go there one more time, after all my certificates are still there, for the final goodbye, if they don't send it over like they told they'll.